Sunday, March 15, 2015

Blog Rock

I used to have such interesting debates on the internet. Sure, they often became contentious and descended into personal attacks. But they were interesting.

Then I grew up. 

Now I'm so stinkin' afraid of offending anyone I can't tell anyone what I believe or think without great anxiety.

No, it's worse than that. Not only can't I tell anyone what I believe or think, now even merely considering issues which are highly charged brings to my mind the faces and words of countless relatives, friends, and acquaintances who would think ill of me for misapprehending or dismissing a point about which they feel strongly.

Yet I have this blog, and every now and then I work up the gumption to write something on it. But who wants to read a blog where the person never says anything that could be disagreed with or thought ignorant? I don't, at least. 

Talking with my wife this morning, I compared my predicament to reading a blog written by a rock. Nobody's ever offended by rocks. If you've ever heard a rock give a controversial opinion or state an unpopular idea, you're out of your mind. Rocks don't talk. But rocks don't blog either, and even if they did nobody would read their blogs.

Rock: Day #1 - still sitting here. 

Rock: Day #2 - still sitting here.

Rock: Day #3 - still... sitting... right here.

Rock: Day #4 - someone stepped on me! I wobbled a bit, now I'm just sitting here again.

And so it would go. And no one would read that blog.

But what about family and friends and acquaintances? What about current and potential future employers who can Google your name? What about a possible future dictatorial, totalitarian, repressive regime? There are endless ways what you say on the internet could come back to haunt you.

Are any of those good reasons to not form, hold to, or communicate opinions, though?

The younger me would be disgusted at the thought, and often was when he encountered it. That Garrett railed against cowards and flatterers and wishy-washy people who he felt were spineless equivocators. Whatever happened to that guy?

Like I say - growing up happened. Or did it? 

Read a guy like Matt Walsh. That guy has guts. He ponders, he forms opinions. He has convictions and opinions and (gasp) he communicates them! 

That could be me. I used to be like Matt Walsh. And when I was, there was an indescribable confidence and self-respect in my possession which enabled me to tell you where I stood on issues and questions. There was a boldness and a firmness of resolve. My thoughts and beliefs mattered to me. My evaluations of things were quick and measured. And my faith informed all my contemplation and communication. But it wasn't enough for me to develop my own views on things. I wanted to influence you. I wanted to draw you into a consideration of deep and meaningful questions, to provoke you to live on purpose, understanding the matters at hand. 

So again, what happened?

Well, for starters, a lot of my bold conversation ticked people off. Who did I think I was to have all these views on things? Only someone with delusions of grandeur would dare to grapple with big issues and do so with authority or confidence.

But that's just it. How would the great men of history have done anything worthwhile if they had resigned themselves to quiet, mindless, vacillating? Nothing great or significant would ever have happened in the history of mankind if all men were content with mediocrity and blandness of ideas.

So who cares if someone disagrees with or is offended by what you say? Fear of being ostracized isn't a good enough reason to swear off having, or stating, your views. And, quite honestly, people need to not be so easily offended. 

The Search for a Church

Next month marks one year since my family moved to Sidney, Montana. I suppose it's about time for us to find a home church here.

Don't misunderstand me, we've tried to find a church. As Christians, my wife and I know the Bible says "Do not neglect the assembling of yourselves together" (Hebrews 10:25). And besides just not wanting to disobey a command of the Scriptures, we sincerely do want to belong to a community of believers again.

Before we moved to Montana three years ago, we were very much involved in a seeker-friendly church in Hillsboro, Ohio. Lauren and I both enjoyed our small groups, and I helped out with multimedia, building slideshows for Sunday morning services and running them. When we moved to Glendive, we again got involved in a local church and built relationships, though not as much as back in Ohio due to living half hour away from our church as opposed to up the block.

Since moving to Sidney, we've visited three local churches, attending one of them for several weeks. We just haven't felt "comfortable" with any of our options. 

And I cringe to use that word - "comfortable." Every time Lauren and I discuss the churches in Sidney, I pause before using that word. The Christian life isn't about comfort, is it? Yes and no. It is and it isn't.

If what makes you comfortable is wickedness and self-indulgence, then pursuing comfort is going to interfere with rather than facilitate the righteous life God has called you to in Christ Jesus. If, on the other hand, spiritual torpor and exalting human philosophy and opinion and tradition over God's Word makes you spiritually uncomfortable, it can be 'OK' to let your discomfort be important to you.

But what happens when you're in a town where you don't feel comfortable attending any of the local churches, but you also don't feel comfortable staying home? 

There's the third option of expanding your search radius and attending a more distant church you feel comfortable with, and we certainly have done that before. Indeed, in Ohio we drove an hour each way for a while to attend our seeker-friendly church in Hillsboro, and in Glendive we had no choice but to drive since we were living in the countryside, a half an hour's drive from any church. But I don't feel particularly "comfortable" with commuting long distance to attend a church. The reason being simple - the longer the commute to a church, the harder it is to get involved in a meaningful way in the lives of your fellow believers, which seems, after all, like one of the major reasons to be part of a church in the first place.

If you drive a long way to attend a church you like, but you're not really able to get involved in the lives of the believers there, why are you going? To hear the preaching? There are podcasts galore for that. To check a box legalistically, marking off attendance for the sake of attendance? That seems worse than worthless.

Our three options are each unsuitable and "uncomfortable." So what do we do? That question has been plaguing me for the past year.

To further complicate matters, my schedule for work has me working every other Sunday. And with five young children, my wife isn't exactly keen on visiting churches without me. If our kiddos are feeling ornery and not particularly obedient on a Sunday where she attends and I'm not there, the potential for mayhem and embarrassment is very real. But attending every other week, or visiting new churches every other week - it definitely slows the process down.

Sunday, January 18, 2015

American Sniper: Reflections on the American War on Terror

Last night I had the privilege of watching the just released, highly acclaimed film American Sniper, an adaptation of an autobiography by the same title about Navy SEAL Chris Kyle, "the deadliest sniper in American military history." Sitting beside me were my brother, a United States Marine, and two brothers-in-law, one of them an Army veteran. 

Carmike Cinemas, the theater in Minot, North Dakota was packed full. Were it not for empty seats in the front row, we might not have been able to find any seats. 

Before seeing the film, the four of us visited a local shooting range and got some target practice in, taking advantage of some warmer weather and clear skies to exercise our 2nd Amendment rights. 

But before hitting the range, we visited the shopping mall, wherein lies the theater, and stopped in at Scheels sporting goods store so I could pick up a warmer shirt for wearing outdoors for a few hours. While we were visiting Scheels, right next door to the theater, we were amazed at the long line of people at the ticket counter, stretching across the walkways and around the theater. Everyone and their brother was there to see American Sniper at 2 o'clock in the afternoon on a Saturday. An even longer line was there when we exited the 5:05 showing after watching the film.

Seeing so many people eager to watch this movie was an encouraging surprise to me, somehow. Sure, everything I had read and heard on the radio was positive, to say the least. But at 28 years old, I have seen how the USA transformed after the terrorist attacks of September 11, watched two brothers-in-law join the Army and my younger brother join the Marine Corps. Between the three of them, I've heard stories of deployments to both Afghanistan and Iraq. I have witnessed the surges of patriotism and of war weariness in this nation, and listened to the speeches of presidents, Bush and Obama, and the ceaseless nit-picking and exhortations of pundits and journalists and politicians, telling Americans at first to be proud of their national heritage and character and emboldening them to fight evil, and then later shaming Americans at home and abroad for having done just that, all but accusing the United States of being a worse evil than the murderers who have set their faces against every free citizen. 

Watching the pendulum swing back from ardent support of to vehement opposition to fighting the terrorists in a meaningful way has been personally disheartening for me. No, the valiant and self-sacrificing efforts of our military personnel have not made me ashamed to be an American, but the weak-kneed voices calling for retreat from and appeasement of terrorists has brought me very close, causing me to wonder whether perhaps those voices have come to represent most closely what and who America is now. 

Yes, I was pleasantly surprised and encouraged last night to see so many people lining up to watch American Sniper, a movie which gives a refreshing vignette of the American Global War on Terror, hoping as I do that the loud cowards boldly espousing their lack of bravery, all the while hiding behind claims that they speak for the majority, do not really speak for America.

After reading American Sniper several weeks ago, and now even moreso after seeing the film made from that book, I hope Chris Kyle represents what America has been, is, and will continue to be. I hope the people who not only lined up to buy tickets to see the movie about his life, but who also sat quietly through the credits rolling at the end of this film, then applauded before departing, represent who we really are as a people.

By God, I hope we are still a courageous people who hate evil and oppression and injustice, who will actively oppose wicked men with firm resolve, and who will celebrate and support those who stand in the gap between the innocent and those who would, if left unchecked, prey upon and enslave, if not outright butcher them. I hope we are a nation that promotes and celebrates and honors the sheep dog, and does not and will never submit to the wolf, or justify his actions, or seek to appease him while we tremble and think only of saving our own necks. If we are an America like that, I can be proud to be a citizen of a great nation. If that's what America is and will be, I am proud to be an American, because that's the kind of America I want to live in and be a part of. That's the sort of nation in which I can be proud to have my four sons grow into men.

American Sniper is a war story, no doubt. But hopefully this popularity it currently enjoys at its release is not derived from this society's bloodlust or love of violence. War is not just what happens on a distant battlefield, not just a series of violent actions, not merely a collection of statistics regarding persons killing, killed, and wounded. War deeply affects real people, and not only in physical ways. There are deep traumas which the mind and the soul suffers in partaking of, participating in, and witnessing war. Every warfighter has a mother and father, many have siblings and spouses and children, and all have friends and acquaintances. And war affects all these people, not only when their loved ones are killed and bodily maimed on the battlefield, but also in the inescapable absences from family, community, and society which their deployment to battlefields require.

"Please bring them home safely" is the sincere prayer of every loving friend and family member of a warfighter. But when our military servicemembers do come home in apparent good health, by God's grace, with all their limbs and five senses apparently intact, the wounds that cannot be seen still need mending. And hopefully, by God's grace, we have reserved a place for them in our hearts, in our homes, and in our communities. Hopefully we have not allowed what they left behind to fall into disrepair, abandoning the principles which they left to fight for and defend.

It is a great shame that many American veterans are homeless and jobless. And while we argued and debated back home, with hollow platitudes and vague allusions to what was the most practical strategy, while we went back and forth with one another about whether we should be fighting this or that war, or whether we were fighting our wars in the right way, these men and women were in harm's way, and many of them were harmed. While they dodged bullets and confronted evil men for us, we tended to our private lives and enjoyed the comforts which the Lord Almighty has blessed us with. But have we forgotten those who sacrificed to guard us from those who would rob and destroy us? 

I hope American Sniper brings us back into sober remembrance of and appreciation for the hardships our military and its families undertook on our behalf. Regardless the motives of various politicians and talking heads, these men and women who served did so with us in mind, remembering and loving us from afar, and that is a great and noble thing worthy of our recognition and gratitude.

In the words of our savior, "Greater love has no man than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends." And that's what the best of them did. Politicians and the elite of our country may or may not have been so noble or self-sacrificing, may or may not have taken advantage of crises or mismanaged their responses to them, but the best of these military men and women set aside their private aspirations, hopes, and dreams for a time at least, knowing that they might never return to the lives they were putting on hold. 

We see that in American Sniper, that some men and women were shot and blown to pieces, and that the rest had to watch it happen before going home to try and reconcile what they had experienced. We see those who survived lifting and carrying their fallen brothers from those who would butcher them, driving their comrades to those who would mend their wounds and give them rest.

May we as Americans be those who rescue, mend, and give rest to those who have been harmed, and may we never forget them or leave them behind. So help us God.